March 26

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Holy Week is here and now it's time for us all to ponder this special time in our own ways. I hope this blog has helped at least one or two people stick to the daily readings.

I'm trying to wrap this up while listening to son play trumpet in the living room, near the front door...where something has died under the front porch. In other words, I'm ending this blog with bleeding ears and the stench of death at my feet. We are packed to go to the Grand Canyon like a bunch of Griswolds on vacation. Happy Easter y'all!

(Oh for the love of God, does not have to be practice time?!?! I cannot think!)

As I reach for Patience and Kindness and some ear plugs, I will be reminiscing about our journey through our bags. This weekend, when we think about Easter baskets and Easter best purses, don't forget about all the wonderful tools and Easter gifts God has packed for us 24-7.

(Ok, now the beagle is howling at him. Yet, the trumpeting continues full bore! Lord. Can you say airline toddy?)

Singing off. Happy Easter and may your Caddy continue to help you use all the perfect tools and equipment he has designed for you to his glory and good works.

⁵   For you are my hope, O LORD God, *
my confidence since I was young. 
⁶   I have been sustained by you ever since I was born; from my mother's womb you have been my strength; *
my praise shall be always of you. 
⁷   I have become a portent to many; *
but you are my refuge and my strength. 
⁸   Let my mouth be full of your praise *
and your glory all the day long. 

March 25

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Ah, the sounds of Spring Break are reverberating through our house. The kids are playing "Burrito" and "Santa with Schnoogie Bear" where they wrap each other or our snarling Beagle puppy in their comforter and then scream bloody murder that they want out. I knew there was a reason I love the drudgery and fast pace of a school day!

Today's tool is the "It's Not About You Brush."Does anyone ever find themselves in a funk when the world is against you? I've been there a few times lately...those moments when I think surely I must have done something to make so-and-so mad. Or so-and-so must not like me much right now. A friend hasn't called me back. I get left off an email. I get a look from somebody. I haven't heard from a family member or friend in a long while. All that, and SURELY it's something I've done or the I'm doing or that I should be doing. I am at fault here. I am so wrong, somehow...someway. It's all about me. Me. Me. Me. Call it paranoia or self-obsession or misplaced concern, but at the end of the day those thoughts revolve around only one person: me.

I was having said thoughts about some dried up communication lines with a family member when Caddy handed me "The BRUSH." The Brush is a reminder that these situations are not about me, in most cases. They are a direct reflection of someone else's unhappiness or challenge or busy life. If I haven't acted out or been ugly, then chances are I need to brush off whatever misplaced concerns I have about myself and refocus that energy on ways I can reach out to others.

The Brush smooths out the tangles, frees us of guilt and with a pop on the fanny, helps us address these negative feelings in terms of others, not ourselves.

During this Holy Week leading into Easter, how relieving it is to use the tools God has given us to refocus on others — and on Him. This week, let's all turn our conscience from "dead works" to worshiping the living God. Not our own paranoid thoughts.

Hebrews 9: "For if the blood of goats and bulls, with the sprinkling of the ashes of a heifer, sanctifies those who have been defiled so that their flesh is purified, how much more will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself without blemish to God, purify our conscience from dead works to worship the living God!"

March 24-- Palm Sunday

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Today is Palm Sunday. It is a miserable looking day. No sun, lots of thick gray clouds...it has been raining and it looks like more is to come. I have packing for our Spring Break trip on the brain, and maybe another cup of coffee. My son is playing the trumpet for the love of Pete, and loudly. My daughter is fuming because the "let's smother each other with our comforters" proved to be a disappointing and scary game. Whining and screaming is prevalent. Church in 30 minutes, really?

Caddy hands me Contemplation. Contemplation is not to be confused with Zoning Out, or Tuning Out or the other similar and less ineffective tools. Contemplation involves detaching, studying and absorbing. Today's reading from Luke 22, the story of Palm Sunday and Jesus final hours are cause for Contemplation. Instead of worrying about umbrellas and jackets and who's doing what when and where, I'm going to choose Contemplation on this special Sunday:

Luke 22:14-23:56

When the hour came, he took his place at the table, and the apostles with him. He said to them, "I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer; for I tell you, I will not eat it until it is fulfilled in the kingdom of God." Then he took a cup, and after giving thanks he said, "Take this and divide it among yourselves; for I tell you that from now on I will not drink of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes." Then he took a loaf of bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and gave it to them, saying, "This is my body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me." And he did the same with the cup after supper, saying, "This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood. But see, the one who betrays me is with me, and his hand is on the table. For the Son of Man is going as it has been determined, but woe to that one by whom he is betrayed!" Then they began to ask one another, which one of them it could be who would do this. A dispute also arose among them as to which one of them was to be regarded as the greatest. But he said to them, "The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them; and those in authority over them are called benefactors. But not so with you; rather the greatest among you must become like the youngest, and the leader like one who serves. For who is greater, the one who is at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one at the table? But I am among you as one who serves. "You are those who have stood by me in my trials; and I confer on you, just as my Father has conferred on me, a kingdom, so that you may eat and drink at my table in my kingdom, and you will sit on thrones judging the twelve tribes of Israel. "Simon, Simon, listen! Satan has demanded to sift all of you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your own faith may not fail; and you, when once you have turned back, strengthen your brothers." And he said to him, "Lord, I am ready to go with you to prison and to death!" Jesus said, "I tell you, Peter, the cock will not crow this day, until you have denied three times that you know me." He said to them, "When I sent you out without a purse, bag, or sandals, did you lack anything?" They said, "No, not a thing." He said to them, "But now, the one who has a purse must take it, and likewise a bag. And the one who has no sword must sell his cloak and buy one. For I tell you, this scripture must be fulfilled in me, 'And he was counted among the lawless' and indeed what is written about me is being fulfilled." They said, "Lord, look, here are two swords." He replied, "It is enough." He came out and went, as was his custom, to the Mount of Olives; and the disciples followed him. When he reached the place, he said to them, "Pray that you may not come into the time of trial." Then he withdrew from them about a stone's throw, knelt down, and prayed, "Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me; yet, not my will but yours be done." Then an angel from heaven appeared to him and gave him strength. In his anguish he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down on the ground. When he got up from prayer, he came to the disciples and found them sleeping because of grief, and he said to them, "Why are you sleeping? Get up and pray that you may not come into the time of trial." While he was still speaking, suddenly a crowd came, and the one called Judas, one of the twelve, was leading them. He approached Jesus to kiss him; but Jesus said to him, "Judas, is it with a kiss that you are betraying the Son of Man?" When those who were around him saw what was coming, they asked, "Lord, should we strike with the sword?" Then one of them struck the slave of the high priest and cut off his right ear. But Jesus said, "No more of this!" And he touched his ear and healed him. Then Jesus said to the chief priests, the officers of the temple police, and the elders who had come for him, "Have you come out with swords and clubs as if I were a bandit? When I was with you day after day in the temple, you did not lay hands on me. But this is your hour, and the power of darkness!" Then they seized him and led him away, bringing him into the high priest's house. But Peter was following at a distance. When they had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard and sat down together, Peter sat among them. Then a servant-girl, seeing him in the firelight, stared at him and said, "This man also was with him." But he denied it, saying, "Woman, I do not know him." A little later someone else, on seeing him, said, "You also are one of them." But Peter said, "Man, I am not!" Then about an hour later still another kept insisting, "Surely this man also was with him; for he is a Galilean." But Peter said, "Man, I do not know what you are talking about!" At that moment, while he was still speaking, the cock crowed. The Lord turned and looked at Peter. Then Peter remembered the word of the Lord, how he had said to him, "Before the cock crows today, you will deny me three times." And he went out and wept bitterly. Now the men who were holding Jesus began to mock him and beat him; they also blindfolded him and kept asking him, "Prophesy! Who is it that struck you?" They kept heaping many other insults on him. When day came, the assembly of the elders of the people, both chief priests and scribes, gathered together, and they brought him to their council. They said, "If you are the Messiah, tell us." He replied, "If I tell you, you will not believe; and if I question you, you will not answer. But from now on the Son of Man will be seated at the right hand of the power of God." All of them asked, "Are you, then, the Son of God?" He said to them, "You say that I am." Then they said, "What further testimony do we need? We have heard it ourselves from his own lips!" Then the assembly rose as a body and brought Jesus before Pilate. They began to accuse him, saying, "We found this man perverting our nation, forbidding us to pay taxes to the emperor, and saying that he himself is the Messiah, a king." Then Pilate asked him, "Are you the king of the Jews?" He answered, "You say so." Then Pilate said to the chief priests and the crowds, "I find no basis for an accusation against this man." But they were insistent and said, "He stirs up the people by teaching throughout all Judea, from Galilee where he began even to this place." When Pilate heard this, he asked whether the man was a Galilean. And when he learned that he was under Herod's jurisdiction, he sent him off to Herod, who was himself in Jerusalem at that time. When Herod saw Jesus, he was very glad, for he had been wanting to see him for a long time, because he had heard about him and was hoping to see him perform some sign. He questioned him at some length, but Jesus gave him no answer. The chief priests and the scribes stood by, vehemently accusing him. Even Herod with his soldiers treated him with contempt and mocked him; then he put an elegant robe on him, and sent him back to Pilate. That same day Herod and Pilate became friends with each other; before this they had been enemies. Pilate then called together the chief priests, the leaders, and the people, and said to them, "You brought me this man as one who was perverting the people; and here I have examined him in your presence and have not found this man guilty of any of your charges against him. Neither has Herod, for he sent him back to us. Indeed, he has done nothing to deserve death. I will therefore have him flogged and release him." Then they all shouted out together, "Away with this fellow! Release Barabbas for us!" (This was a man who had been put in prison for an insurrection that had taken place in the city, and for murder.) Pilate, wanting to release Jesus, addressed them again; but they kept shouting, "Crucify, crucify him!" A third time he said to them, "Why, what evil has he done? I have found in him no ground for the sentence of death; I will therefore have him flogged and then release him." But they kept urgently demanding with loud shouts that he should be crucified; and their voices prevailed. So Pilate gave his verdict that their demand should be granted. He released the man they asked for, the one who had been put in prison for insurrection and murder, and he handed Jesus over as they wished. As they led him away, they seized a man, Simon of Cyrene, who was coming from the country, and they laid the cross on him, and made him carry it behind Jesus. A great number of the people followed him, and among them were women who were beating their breasts and wailing for him. But Jesus turned to them and said, "Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me, but weep for yourselves and for your children. For the days are surely coming when they will say, 'Blessed are the barren, and the wombs that never bore, and the breasts that never nursed.' Then they will begin to say to the mountains, 'Fall on us' and to the hills, 'Cover us.' For if they do this when the wood is green, what will happen when it is dry?" Two others also, who were criminals, were led away to be put to death with him. When they came to the place that is called The Skull, they crucified Jesus there with the criminals, one on his right and one on his left. Then Jesus said, "Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing." And they cast lots to divide his clothing. And the people stood by, watching; but the leaders scoffed at him, saying, "He saved others; let him save himself if he is the Messiah of God, his chosen one!" The soldiers also mocked him, coming up and offering him sour wine, and saying, "If you are the King of the Jews, save yourself!" There was also an inscription over him, "This is the King of the Jews." One of the criminals who were hanged there kept deriding him and saying, "Are you not the Messiah? Save yourself and us!" But the other rebuked him, saying, "Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed have been condemned justly, for we are getting what we deserve for our deeds, but this man has done nothing wrong." Then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." He replied, "Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in Paradise." It was now about noon, and darkness came over the whole land until three in the afternoon, while the sun's light failed; and the curtain of the temple was torn in two. Then Jesus, crying with a loud voice, said, "Father, into your hands I commend my spirit." Having said this, he breathed his last. When the centurion saw what had taken place, he praised God and said, "Certainly this man was innocent." And when all the crowds who had gathered there for this spectacle saw what had taken place, they returned home, beating their breasts. But all his acquaintances, including the women who had followed him from Galilee, stood at a distance, watching these things. Now there was a good and righteous man named Joseph, who, though a member of the council, had not agreed to their plan and action. He came from the Jewish town of Arimathea, and he was waiting expectantly for the kingdom of God. This man went to Pilate and asked for the body of Jesus. Then he took it down, wrapped it in a linen cloth, and laid it in a rock-hewn tomb where no one had ever been laid. It was the day of Preparation, and the sabbath was beginning. The women who had come with him from Galilee followed, and they saw the tomb and how his body was laid. Then they returned, and prepared spices and ointments. On the sabbath they rested according to the commandment.

March 23

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Today have been fiddling with the Resignation tool. It's what you grab when there's really no other plan of action to take. On Friday, I thought I'd get good and ready for spring break by running in for a spray tan...you know, to get a little color for our trip out West. Let's just say I didn't apply enough of the barrier cream to my hands and feet and now I am suffering the consequences. I look like I have some kind of liver disease, at least when I give someone a high five. Yuck. Uh oh spaghettios.

Caddy tossed me Resignation when I woke up and saw the full extent of my temporary sallowness. I can't scrub it off, or peel it off, or wash the crap out of my hands, or put acid on myself. That's what I get for approaching vanity. I get stuck with sick orange hands and yellow smokers fingernails. Oh well.

(This just in: Caddy tossed David Resignation when he screamed too loud during Monopoly and the dog butt-juiced on him. Resignation.)

March 22

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Sure. Just like the tools No, and Yes, Sure is a handy tool to pull out of the tool bag. Sure also goes by the name of Of Course. It's the tool your Caddy hands you when he knows you're really not that into it, but you have the time and resources to be into it, and well, you might as well just do it.

So Ben and I are here enjoying our first day of spring break. He slept in, although I've already had a full morning running little sis to school for her last day in the classroom. After washing back some donuts and asking me the dreaded, "What are we going to do today?" he proposes we go bowling, or do the zip line at the Alligator Farm. Caddy hands me No right away, which I implement. Then Ben suggests Monopoly. I physically want to fold laundry or run some errands or take an ice bath rather than play the often-hours-long Monopoly, but Caddy persists with his selection: Sure.

Sure. It may not be your idea of a fantabulous event or activity, but it probably is to the person who gets the Sure nod.  So here we go...plans for the day are in motion. Spring Break has officially begun. We have passed Go, I'm just hoping for a little Free Parking.

Jeremiah 29: 12: "For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope. Then when you call upon me and come and pray to me, I will hear you. When you search for me, you will find me; if you seek me with all your heart,"

March 21

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I look forward to whipping out my Rest tool for the next 11 days. Spring Break has officially begun. I just put my "out of office" button on and my message says something to the effect of "don't bug me until next week." I am checkin out, baby. Check. In. Out. Going to use a little Rest and his friend, Relaxation.

It's so easy and exhausting to get used to the rigors of every day routine. I'm not sure about you, but I find myself in go-go-go mood (Burro! Burro! Burro! in Farsi, I believe) every day of the week...and on most Saturdays and Sundays depending on the schedule. Rest is a welcome respite from this fast moving train. However, it can be mistaken for its evil twin Snooze or Doze, which make way for the evilist of doo-dads...Sloth and Slug. Rest, however, is one a-ok mama jamma.

Rest works because it yields Peace. Rest is falling into peace and relishing in the assurance that God has got it all covered, and you don't need to worry one more minute about anything. Rest helps your mind from bouncing around. Look, I'm doing it now because my mind has wandered to this news:

A good friend just told me she's having another baby. Lord, this gal is doing the 40-year-old thing and now a baby. Wowzers. She's excited, and after joking her about having to hang up her dancing on the bar table shoes, I shared in her anticipation and elation. Babies are a pain, but nothing beats that freshess, the snuggly warmth and their pure joy. And the sleep a LOT when they're little. And that means rest for mama.

Psalm 131:" ³  But I still my soul and make it quiet, like a child upon its mother's breast; *
my soul is quieted within me."

Got Rest? Happy Spring Break!

March 20

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Due to lack of brain cells and a busy day that has taken me many places before noon, I'm still stuck on yesterday's tool examination: the "Shut-the-heck-and-Listen" Tool. A little Lenten challenge for you today. Whether you use passive voice or rearrange your sentence structure or follow the rules literally, try to finish off the rest of the day without using the word "I" or "me" in a sentence.

It is expected to be a tough assignment for this ole bag, promises there!

In the words of Vanilla Ice, "Stop! Collaborate...and Listen." When I and me are out of the equation, you are forced to ask more questions of others and, yes, listen.

Or this, one of this 1970s-born blogger's all time absolute favorite ditties in the whole wide world:

March 19

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Listening-And-Asking-Questions. What a great resource in ye ole tool box. This gadget is harder for some than others. It's a heavier, clunkier tool for those of us who like to begin every conversation or story with the word "I." Every dialogue is peppered with "I's" and "me's" and the content pretty much revolves around the biggest star of the show..."ME" or "MY____."

The use of this tool requires us to shut up and listen. Then ask questions. The joy that results is someone sharing personal details and experiences that could very well be blessings to you. At the very least, you have made that person feel awesome about themselves!

I use Listening-And-Asking-Questions for a living. First at the Business Journals in Austin and Jacksonville, then at The Resident and now at a school. I can tell you (look here I go with the I's and me's! Sorry, but point needed here...) open-ended, less specific questions yield the best answers. And those uncomfortable, long pauses or bits of silence? Well, don't interrupt those with a nervous fill-in. My experience has shown me that a brilliant answer ensues. All that...when we ask questions, and listen.

Just like in the reading today, we can treasure these moments in our heart:

Luke 2: "After three days they found him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. And all who heard him were amazed at his understanding and his answers."

March 18

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Contentment is another underused but important tool in the bag. I try to use mine, but wish I would with more consistency. In my haste of looking forward and imagining how it will be "when" or how it would be "if," I sometimes forget to just bloom where I'm planted. We don't make ourselves extraordinary, that's God's job, right?

I love the reading today from Romans 9:

"But who indeed are you, a human being, to argue with God? Will what is molded say to the one who molds it, "Why have you made me like this?" Has the potter no right over the clay, to make out of the same lump one object for special use and another for ordinary use?"

So instead of wondering how great I'd be if I were a professional volunteer, or a brawny tennis player or a world renowned published writer or a style maven, or the most respected professional in my field, or a bad a** runner, or a mom with all the right moves...maybe I should just throw a little Contentment at myself and remember one important fact: I am NOT the potter.

In fact...I have some very saweet mom moves. I often remember what days I'm supposed to pack the lunchbox without being reminded! I run slow. So. What. I have a great job, it came to me like an angel blessing! I can still rock my 10-year-old Juicy sweatpants, yes indeedy. I AM a published writer, hello? Maybe not world renowned, but known by a few blog readers, right? I don't even want to play tennis that badly. I would go crazy, I think, volunteering my time any more than I do currently. So lucky me.

Perhaps Contentment looks like a wad of that ugly art room clay. That brown, heavy earthy-smelling cloddy stuff. It's a good reminder that Contentment is all we can use or be when the Potter is at the wheel. We have no say how we're going to be used, so why not just be happy in the circumstances we've been given?

March 17

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All this talk about grounding and punishment has reminded me how much I often punish myself for missteps and mistakes. I am the queen of stumbling or screwing up and then dwelling on it for weeks on end. It's such a toxic place to be. While I do think it's a good exercise to recognize a fault or concern and address lessons learned, I think stewing about mistakes is a mucky place to live.

That's when Blinders come in handy. They force you to focus on the present and look ahead toward the future.

I hope my little grounded one learns her lesson, slaps on her Blinders and moves forward without injury of spirit. I hope the same for myself next time I pack my son his sister's shirt for weight training (whoops!) or feel responsible for my child's poor study habits (not my bag, right?) or fumble something at work. I'm going to tuck this into my purse

Philippians 3: 14: "but this one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ Jesus."

March 16

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I have a grounded child at the house. I originally thought this weekend might be a quiet, thought-provoking time, perhaps even a little freeing. But oh no. Oh hell no. I can barely blog or use the computer without my little friend asking me what the heck she's supposed to do without friends, computers or television. She's so....BOOOORED. It is all I can do now, at the tail end of the day, to sneak away from her presence for a minute and type!

She is calling my name right this minute. Lord!

Quickly, the tool I used today was Nostalgia. We made Bishop's Bread, one of my grandmother and mom's favorites. Making an old recipe together made this grounding feel, for an instant, fun.

Nostalgia's appeal is comfort and joy. It brings you back to a place of happiness and makes you feel pleased that something you loved has been carried forward.

Thank you Nostalgia, for being a light in a very long, whiney day.

March 15

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I woke up this morning ready to talk about the Yes tool. It lives right next to its brother, No, and can be a very useful device when used properly and thoughtfully. Saying "Yes" to requests or asks for help is so often the right thing to do. But of course we all have to worry about using Yes TOO much. That can drive a gal or guy to the brink, or at least the drink. So in good doses and when undeniably the right weapon to use, Yes is great little gadget.

Last night, for example, a sweet young lady sent an email out asking people to leave food on their front porches. She's gathering  bags of food for students at her school who don't have food to eat when school's closed. Yes hopped out of the holster and said, "giddyup!!! Let's do this thing!" Easy, do-able, worthy and supportive of an undertaking that is admirable. Thank you Yes.

While I woke up ready to talk and write about Yes, my mind took a detour this morning before carpool. Remember yesterday when we were talking about how all the naughtiness going on in the FOP and Lt. Gov's office could be a lesson of honesty for my children? I called it Life Long Learning. It's a strength and perhaps a tool to put into service. Remember how I got some satisfaction out of saying that we should teach our kids that if they lie or do something illegal, they're GOING to get caught? Well, we had one such conversation on the car ride to school. And I'll just say it wasn't inspired by the front page news.

While that lesson is easy to think about having, it's not simple by any stretch. Lifelong Learner, or the Teacher Tool, comes with lots of emotion and yuck. Learning the lessons of why we don't lie, cheat or act with dishonesty is tough. It's a heavy, heavy tool.

The verse that stuck out to me today was more about Yes than about Lifelong Learner. But now that I look at it again, it resonates for both I think:

Romans 8:28-39: "We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose."

Sometimes when using Yes we become part of a greater good, where God fulfills his work and purpose through a group effort. And yes, Lifelong Learner is a hard lesson...but it's for the good for "those who love God."

So, so, so glad it's Friday. Cheers.

March 14

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Psalm 73 includes a short commentary about someone who sometimes doesn't choose the right tools or responses, and doesn't always seek his Caddy's advice for the right weapon. And how often do we all find ourselves in that spot...when we're mad, or our feelings are hurt and we say things we shouldn't or act in a way that is unbecoming, even stupid.

²¹ When my mind became embittered, *
I was sorely wounded in my heart.
²² I was stupid and had no understanding; *
I was like a brute beast in your presence.
²³ Yet I am always with you; *
you hold me by my right hand.
I love this because it's such a timeless message: Yes we are like bulls in a china store sometimes, but God's always got us by the hand trying to navigate us through without too much destruction. No matter what kind of brute beast are, we are perfectly equipped to act like an angel.

I feel like a brute beast over all the news coming out of Florida and Jacksonville this week. Seemingly respectable people involved in a $300 million raketeering case? The Fraternal Order of Police are involved, and now the Lt. Governor of our great state? And did anyone read Ron Littlepage's column about the local firemen? Those fine civil servants are auctioning off an AK-37 assault rifle "built just how you want it" at their upcoming fundraiser. And they think that's just fine! In the wake of Sandy Hook, Aurora, even Episcopal School of Jacksonville,this seems to me to be a total lack of sensitivities and sensibilities...no matter what our rights are as citizens of this country!

Errrrgggggg. So what do you pull out of the bag when you hear things like this?

I have been praying about that this morning. What tool, Caddy? Pity, Compassion and Patience tumbled out at my feet for a start. Then the Lifelong Learner popped out. In my compassion for these people who have made poor choices, I can also be a teacher for my children: you do something against the law, or against the sensitivities of a loving community, and you're going to get caught. You're going to get burned. Nothing good comes out of illegal choices, out of a me-first mentality. But God will still have you by the right hand. And if someone thinks long and hard about it first, there may be some folks who can muster a little Pity, Compassion and Patience for you.

What china store have you been a bull in today? What kind of Pity party are you throwing for those who have done you wrong?

March 13

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Death. Nice morning thought, ins't it? It's coming for all of us one day. But in the meantime, what do we say and do for others who are facing it now? Just in the last few weeks, several friends have lost love ones...family, friends and in some cases, pets. What's in our bag to meet this gaping need?

There are many appropriate tools to grab, I think. You can use your ears, and listen...be a presence. You can use a pencil, pen or keyboard to share personal words of comfort and love. Or, like people have been doing for centuries, you can reach down deep into your bag and grab some cash to purchase or make comfort food. Sustenance meets needs on so many practical and emotional levels. If you have the time and resources, and/or the cooking skills to make it happen, share the tool of food...no one will be sorry you did.

Time is a little short these days for this old bag. Between the new job and kids' chauffering needs, and our own daily sustenance (not to mention laundry and the likes), I can barely get our own food in a crock pot and serve it up each night. My friends' losses have been weighing on me, and the food tool rose right to the top of my bag yesterday. With a few quick keyboard strikes, I ordered some smoked turkeys for delivery, and got back to my own crick crocking. Fooding somebody in need does not need to take a day's worth of preparation. Somtimes, as I discovered, it just takes five minutes to send someone suffering a little love.

Something in today's reading really stood out to me. And I suppose it's somewhat related to death, or dying to wordly ways. It's about living in the spirit. For some reason, this thought really invigorated me this morning: Romans 8: 1-11: "But you are not in the flesh; you are in the Spirit, since the Spirit of God dwells in you."

Wow, right! We are so often fooled by the physical appearances and desires of our bodies that we forget who we really are: "in the spirit." It's an intoxicating thought, to be in and of the spirit. Now if we could on apply it more regularly in the work God asks us to do each day.

OK, off to try to live in the Spirit. How does God want you to forgo the flesh and relish in the Spirit? Anyone you know need a little food thrown their way today?

March 12

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Sleep is a precious commodity, and also a Hairy Monster. I remember the days when there was so little of it...when our babies would wake up throughout the night, for months even years on end. I remember the early wakeup calls from toddlers with full diapers and empty tummies. It sometimes felt like I would never sleep again with any consistency. But sure enough, the kids got older and now I sleep on my own terms for the most part. I'm the one who decides to wake up early for a run or sleep in on the off-chance of a free morning. No one's breathing in my face from my bedside willing me to wakeup and make them an Eggo waffle at 4 a.m. Thank God!

Until last night. Poor Marley stayed home yesterday with a fever and sore throat. After a day of boredom that produced THREE pulled teeth and lots of television, I thought she was cured. But the 1 a.m. "I'm so hot" wakeup call proved otherwise.

Sleep can be a bigger gatekeeper sometimes than the Caddy. I had to practically punch Sleep in the face so I could hear what my Caddy was offering me early this morning. He tossed me Gentleness and Kindness. I used my kid gloves to administer Advil and share a snuggle. Before Sleep attacked me again, Kindness prevailed with an invitation to sleep next to me for a bit until her fever subsided.

What are you going to punch in the face today to clear the path for some heavenly help?

March 11

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Today's scripture reading shares the ultimate bag story. It's a story about a lunch bag...the lunch bag someone's mother packed for her child, much like the one we have packed or may be packing for our own children. Like our purses, this lunch bag was prepared with everything this young child would need for himself and others that day:

John 6:1-15

After this Jesus went to the other side of the Sea of Galilee, also called the Sea of Tiberias. A large crowd kept following him, because they saw the signs that he was doing for the sick. Jesus went up the mountain and sat down there with his disciples. Now the Passover, the festival of the Jews, was near. When he looked up and saw a large crowd coming toward him, Jesus said to Philip, "Where are we to buy bread for these people to eat?" He said this to test him, for he himself knew what he was going to do. Philip answered him, "Six months' wages would not buy enough bread for each of them to get a little." One of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter's brother, said to him, "There is a boy here who has five barley loaves and two fish. But what are they among so many people?" Jesus said, "Make the people sit down." Now there was a great deal of grass in the place; so they sat down, about five thousand in all. Then Jesus took the loaves, and when he had given thanks, he distributed them to those who were seated; so also the fish, as much as they wanted. When they were satisfied, he told his disciples, "Gather up the fragments left over, so that nothing may be lost." So they gathered them up, and from the fragments of the five barley loaves, left by those who had eaten, they filled twelve baskets. When the people saw the sign that he had done, they began to say, "This is indeed the prophet who is to come into the world."

Significant to note that this boy's simple act of sharing his bag content led to ultimate satisfaction: belief in the presence of God.

Pretty powerful stuff. I have every doubt that the lunch I'm packing for my daughter today will score me the Best Mom Ever Award. But I have every confidence that the bag God's packed her, and the caddy she has to help her choose her strengths wisely, will help her do great things today.

March 10

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Happy Sunday to you. I hope your weekend has been productive, or restful, or fun, or whatever you'd hoped it would be.

As you know, I was going for productive this weekend. And after a near full day of gittinitalldun, I'm sitting here with my coffee and the Sunday paper in a quiet house wondering (of all things), "What's next."

I didn't need a caddy to tell me what my response should be to that. Luckily, Gratitude jumped out of my fanny pack and sat on my shoulder. With it's slick, sweet smelling balm, it reminded me to just enjoy this moment of completion and solitude.

"What's next" surely will come without me having to think a minute more about it.

March 9

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Wowzers! Watch what you ask your caddy, he might just help you knock it out of the park!

So yesterday, I was feeling mild angst that I was going to have absolutely no time this weekend to scratch a big source of guilt off my list. I am overdue preparing the volunteer copywriting for an upcoming school fundraising event. Erg. One of those things I said yes to and wish I hadn't. Anyway, I digress. Yesterday I thought I would start with this predicament as I practiced seeking the right tool before acting.

My first thoughts were Patience and some Deep Breaths.

Well by golly, wouldn't you know within seconds of posting that someone asked if Marley could sleepover Saturday night...and go ice-skating before from the early afternoon on? With David and Ben out hunting all day and night that out-of-the-blue, very coincidental, rather...HUGE BLESSING...act translates to 6-8 hours of time to sit in front of the computer and complete the task.

I couldn't have planned it any better. Maybe that's the point, right? Maybe when we seek guidance first, the best plans unfold?

Patience also played out last night. David and I went to dinner with some friends to a local dive. I mean it is a dirty, hole-in-the-wall dive. But it is a popular place on Friday and Saturday nights. That's when the flamboyant chef steps away from the barbecue and serves up a huge fresh fried seafood buffet. This is Art, clearly on a slow night:

His food on a Friday or Saturday night is to die for. And people come from all over, despite the seedy nature of the establishment. We followed the rules and made a reservation for 6, then got there at 6:30 as directed to wait for the dinner bell. Let's just say the owner/chef is fabulous in every way but one: keeping a reservation list. There was no room at the inn. We contemplated other plans. But Patience proved yet again to be a worthy tool. Just before the dinner bell rang at 7 p.m. we were all seated in a row at an old  sticky table in the corner...with a mish mash of chairs they literally pulled out of the alley and back storage room. The dinner was delicious.

Patience prevailed.

What tool did you use yesterday and what has your caddy suggested for today's activities?

March 8

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Now it's time for the fun stuff. We know what kind of resources God has packed for all of us and what special tools he has given each of us specifically. And maybe these tools, or qualities, will continue to manifest themselves as we move forward. But now begins the fun Lenten challenge of USING what's in our bags as a method of practice.

It's time to let the Holy Spirit be our caddy and ask for His direction on the right stick to use from our bag. That's right, it's time to start playing some golf.

Maybe that sounds a little disrespectful to think of God in terms of a caddy, or to compare his work to Caddyshack. But it is a good visual isn't it? And Lord help me if Chevy Chase isn't the funniest living comedian.

As we work our way into the final two weeks or so of Lent, try to make a conscious effort to consider your arsenal with each challenge or event. Perhaps there's even a breath or a quick caddy consult (prayer) before choosing the most effective doodad. And are there promises for a hole-in-one every time? Heck no! We're humans, and everyone knows there is a large margin out there for human error. But wouldn't it be neat if the more we assess and inventory the tools in our bag before acting, the better our results become?

Here's the fairway I'm looking down today: I have to sit in front of my computer for what will probably be at least six- to eight-hours and write copy for the school auction guide. This is a fun process for me personally, because I get to pull out all my puns and write jingly jangles and get busy with words. But this is also one of those weekends where I can see the end before it begins — one thing after another. Translation, not much word-zoning in front of the computer. After a quick consult with my caddy, I've decided to give a combination Three Deep Breaths and Faithfulness a try. Or maybe it's Trust, or perhaps I'll give Peace a lookie-loo.

What hole are you on today?

March 7

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As you may be doing now, I am still contemplating what some of the other tools might be in my bag. This seems like a very self-serving, self-centered, boastful exercise. But hopefully identifying some of these strengths will give you, and me, a better idea about how God has equipped us for our life's mission.

These are a few of the things I feel are my talents, or gifts, things I like or possibly things I might be good at doing, or that come naturally in some way. Again, please don't read this and think how much I must love myself. Just as a matter of exercise, I think writing these qualities down may help me better know what resources are lurking in my bag. I'm sure your list looks a lot different, and hopefully a lot longer!

Things I think I might be good at doing, things I like, or things that are perhaps natural gifts/tendancies:

Empathy/Sympathy
Listening
Learning
Loving on people
Giving gifts
Creativity
Music
Writing (some days)
Processing
Being respectful
Being helpful
Seeing the good in people
Being inspired by others' ideas
Pragmatic
Hard-working
Spur-of-the-moment-grabber
Presence
Team player
Good follower of instructions
Humble
Self-depricating
Tender-hearted
Introspective
People-lover
Feeler

This is a first stab at the list of tools in my bag, potentially. And still, I look into my purse and see a whole lot of other junk floating around. At first glance, these items look to be weaknesses. Perhaps those "negative qualities" skulking in the corners of my bag might include:

Hastiness
Fly-of-the-handleness
Judgementalism
Snarkiness
Scrappiness
Irritation
Impatience
Grrrrr-ness


...and a whole slew of darker descriptives that I dare not even write about for fear they may define me! Makes me wonder though, could our shortcomings or "areas of improvement tools" actually be helpful doo-dads when handled properly and in the right situation?

Not sure. So maybe for now, we leave our weaknesses where they are.

March 6

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This stood out to me today from the scripture readings. I love this promise that in suffering, we grow, and get better, and learn:

Romans 5: 1-11: "Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope and hope does not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured into our hearts (editorial side note: and bags!) through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us."

Today begins the part of this Lenten blog that we investigate the personal contents of our bag. It's a daunting task to reflect on our strengths and talents and define those as perhaps tools that God has given us to bless others. But it's do-able. It's especially do-able if you can find some quiet moments to think.

I looked for those moments yesterday. And when I found them, while the family and I were nestled in the couch after dinner watching "The Man With the 200-Pound Tumor" (can I insert here, yuck...and sad...a little inspiring...but sorry, totally gross), I fell asleep. Down time can do that to a gal. Determining a mental list of my strengths took center stage this morning, but there were fragmented periods of solace.

I did get a reminder, however, of one double-edged strength or personal attribute I have that perhaps fits in my tool box somewhere. It's sympathy and empathy. OK, so the man with the 200-pound tumor was a good reminder, it turns out. I felt really deeply, sickly sorry for this guy in Vietnman who has been lugging a 200-pound mass around for more than 10 years. And empathy? Sure enough...I imagined how that would feel, and I didn't like it for one minute. One of my gifts is feeling utterly sorry for people. Although perhaps that's a curse, who knows.

This morning empathy and sympathy rose to the top of my bag again when I heard about a friend whose child is struggling with some social challenges. I felt her pain in my bones. I was so frustrated and mad for her that my head felt hot. I felt a surge of compassion and anger, as if it were happening to me and my children. I am sympathetic and empathetic today for all the students, faculty and families of Episcopal School of Jacksonville who face the one-year anniversary of Dale Reagan's murder. These feelings rear up again when I think about how some of the seemingly small cuts we have to make at church might affect others. Dang empathy and sympathy!

Empathy/Sympathy. Tool or terror?
What about you, what did you discover during this morning's digging?

March 5

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Time for a little recap:

1. God equips all of us with a tool bag full of everything we could possibly ever need to complete the work he has in mind for us.

2. This bag might feel awfully dang heavy if we were actually wearing it. Imagine a fanny pack full of every tool you'll ever need.

3. Our bags all have names. Mine is "Very Present Help in Trouble Tote." Yours is ________.

4. Within our bags, God places a Complete Set. It's the same for all his children. We're born with our bag and this totally awesome, free to all, no shipping and handling charge included, Complete Set.

5. What's in the complete set? Glad you asked. The contents of the set include:

Faithfullness (A Thor-like hammer)
Love (A big wet blanket)
Gentleness (Leather kid Gloves)
Goodness (A Golden Halo)
Patience (A Proton Beam? Fingercuffs...your call)
Peace (A plug)
Self-Control (Handcuffs/Blindfold)
Joy (Rice)
Kindness (a Lei)

BUT THAT's NOT IT....

6. This Complete Set also includes a special BONUS GIFT...

Gratitude (80s lip gloss)

7. In addition to the Complete Set and Bonus Gift, God also gives each of us a distinct collection of strengths, gifts, personality traits and talents. These are different for each person on the planet. Not one bag looks the same when it comes to the ancilliary -- yet exceedingly important -- personal stuff floating around the the murse/purse. This is what we'll begin exploring next.

So while some of our bags may look the same on the outside and ALL of us have Complete Sets with a Bonus Gift, the rest of our bag contents look very, very different.

And here's the kicker: It's super easy to look into someone elses' bag and see what kind of strengths and talents and positives they have jostling around. But the more difficult task is being aware of our own shtuff. For example, I can tell you that some of my son's strengths are self-sufficiency, diligence, respect and intelligence. My daughter's are zest, sincerity, affection and playfulness. I can tell you that my dad has the gift of knowing what to say at the right time and how to make you feel better about things. My husband has the gift of organization and prudence and humor. While I can look into my bag and see a few familiar things, being aware of personal strengths does not come easy -- and I dare say that's the truth for most people.

So how do we begin discoveirng our strengths? Our other tools? First we ask ourselves. Then we poll others who love us and know us deeply. Maybe it begins with a heartfelt list, and quiet time during which to consider it. Perhaps we do what psycholgists and scientists do: test and research.

Take a minute today to reflect on your strengths, talents and gifts. Write them down. Need a little "professional advice?" Check out this website for some Myers-Briggs-like testing and feedback. I just did. I'm an ISFJ: introverted, sensing, feeling, judging. Not sure if that's good or bad, but it is what it is. Here's a link to the site: Human Metrics.

Over the next week or so, let's talk about what we find out...What's your bag, baby? What's in your wallet?

March 4

For Today's Forward Day by Day reading, Click Here.

It's at the tail end of yet another work day and I feel like I have seen and done nothing worth blogging about. Boring. Bo. Ring. I woke up in way-to-early-thirty after a two-dog night (burr! and yes, there were two dogs keeping us warm last night) to warm up and made it home in enough time to shower, manage the kids' a.m. lollygagging, take carpool and slide into my office by 8 a.m. — quitting time, as always, came quickly and it is no surprise at all that my day already is almost over now. Nothing exciting. Nothing to write the world about. Just, done.

Aren't days just a blur like that sometimes?

Today's reading talked a lot about how it feels when the days are anything but short and boring. In Jeremiah there's a lot of talk about how bummed they feel to be "cast out." The psalmist laments about whether the Lord's going to "cast me off forever." "How long will you be angry, Lord?" another asks. These days probably felt pretty dang long, lonely, and from the sounds of things the people boo-hooing about it saw no end in sight.

And still we're all called to weather the storm with the complete set and personal strengths in our tool bag— during our most mundane of days, and during the ones that seem interminable and dreadful. Maybe we use Patience. Maybe we clip into a little Self-Control or sling a little Kindness around somebody. And maybe, we dig down way deep to the dusty, gum-wrapper littered bottom of our bag and pull out the "Special Gift Included." Like any complete set, ours includes a little bonus feature. This little do-dad is so functional you can use it any time, any place and for any reason. In fact, we're supposed to use it — get this — in every circumstance. That's right, we're supposed to use this Bonus Gift every day, all the time in whatever situation. It's called Gratitude.

Gratitude comes with this instruction manual: It reads, "WARNING: 1 Thessalonians 5:18: "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

Even when we feel like God's left us out to dry we should, that's right, be thankful. When our day has been so humdrum we want to indulge in a little Housewives of Beverly Hills for a little comparative therapy? Yup — it's time for a little Attitude of Gratitude.

Our Gratitude Bonus Tool looks like lip gloss. Maybe like this little blast from ye old past:

You have to keep applying it throughout the day if you want it to have avoid the parched, sucking on lemons, shriveling, Maloof Hoof lip look.

I just applied a thick coat of Gratitude and I already feel better. Thank you God for keeping everyone I love safe today. Thank you for giving me a job that I can manage and makes me happy. Thank you for my family who is well enough to eat my crock pot cooking. Thank you for the dogs who keep me warm at night. Thank you for making it possible for me to run in 30-degree weather. Thank you for peace this day when so many others can't find it.

What are you thankful for today?

March 3

For Today's Forward Day by Day readings, click here.

Well, we've just about finished looking at all the tools in the complete set God has packed for us in our bags. Our complete set includes the following items:

Peace — Plug
Gentleness — Kid Gloves
Love — A Wet Blanket
Goodness — A Golden Halo
Kindness — A Lei
Faith — A Thor-Like Hammer
Self-Control — Handcuffs/Blindfold (not the 50 Shades of Grey kind, right?)
Joy — Rice

The only one we have left to inspect is Patience. And you will have to practice it by waiting until tomorrow for a good description of this tool.

Mean, right? Truth is, I'm having trouble thinking of a good visual for Patience. Patience has so many facets — its instructions require the user to embrace the present, to be grateful in every circumstance and to put full trust in God's plan. Patience requires nothing of the user except to wait. The user of Patience  must be content to pause planning and doing and acting. Patience has no time for efficiencies or expectations or forward movement. Patience has no concept of the user's timing.

Now I ask you, what the heck kind of tool does that look like?

My first thought was finger-cuffs. Chinese finger cuffs.

If you have children, or were a child once, you know exactly what I'm talking about. They're those basket-weave tubes kids get at birthday parties. If you stick a finger in either side and pull as hard as you can, the thing gets really tight. Like, panicky tight. That makes you want to pull your fingers out even harder. But the harder you yank, the bigger the squeeze. The only way to remove your fingers is to relax, relent, and push your fingers together ever so gently.

But that doesn't capture the full extent of the Patience tool.

I also considered the Proton Stream tool from the movie, Ghostbusters. (here again, I remind you that this writer is an 80s sci-fi nerd) Perhaps Patience is like the electricity producing gun that captures wayward spirits and lowers them into the open Ghost Box below. But that doesn't really nail it either. It's all something you'd have to point at yourself, which wouldn't be altogether impossible...but could be challenging.

I guess the theme that emerges here with the tool of Patience is the feeling being trapped...but in the best way possible. Patience teaches us to be trapped by God's perfect plan for us. It requires us to sit still, to stop pulling with all our might, to get wrapped up in God's laser love and get lowered into a box where we shut up, sit and wait for God's perfect next step for us.

Next time you feel like pulling harder, or pushing forward with all your might, or striking back with angry words or exhibiting frustration, get your Proton Beam Finger Cuffs out and laser yourself into a place for safe keeping and waiting.

March 2

For Today's Forward Day by Day readings, click here.

Happy Saturday! The weekend is a great time to talk about one of the happiest little tools in our set: Joy. It has a short name. It doesn't take long to say. It even sounds perky when you say it. But this tool is nothing short — of amazing.

Today I am doing something I haven't enjoyed for a long time: I'm joining three friends to play a gig. We're playing prelude, processional and recessional music for a small wedding. I used to tote my cello around and play holiday parties and such during high school. I didn't do it as much in college because I realized it was much more fun to ATTEND the holiday parties and the ones through the school year. So it's been awhile. I'm actually excited about it, and I'm not sure whether I'm most happy to play the music or to see a couple get married — we have fallen off the wedding circuit during the past few decades as well.

Weddings embody joy. There's nothing sad about them. It's a celebration of commitment, new beginnings and love. Pure joy. Music is the same way, I think. But playing music is the act of expressing joy. Psalmists write of singing and making music and dancing throughout the book. In fact, there's one in today's reading: Psalm 27: 9: "Therefore, I will offer in his dwelling an oblation with sounds of great gladness...I will sing and make music to the Lord."

Bottom line: the tool of Joy reminds me of the rice people throw post-wedding ceremony. I'm sure there's a tradition or reason rice is thrown. And I'm pretty sure it's illegal now...I think it kills birds. Not sure on that though. But on a very surface level, throwing rice is so jubilant and carefree.

Who are you going to throw a little rice on today?

March 1

For Today's Forward Day by Day readings, click here.

Today's tool: Peace. And it couldn't come at a better time. I am now writing this at the tail end of my day, rather than in the morning when I'm fresh and in "my good place." Peace. The thought of it makes we want to do a million yoga ummmms, or take a Calgon bath. Or have some wine (now I'm talkin!). Or a few deep breaths. I think I'll do that now. Wine next, definitely.

If I were to describe Peace in terms of a tool, it would look very much like...a plug. Like this:

Peace's super power is forcing people to drop what they're doing, stop thinking, and plug in. It's only when we do this that Peace begins its mighty work. Once we're good and detained, Peace encourages us to breathe in, breathe out and consider one of the most important, peace-making facts out there. Today's reading from John 5:30 sums up Peace's marching order: "I seek to do not my own will but the will of him who sent me." Peace fights back with a message that all this mayhem we create for ouselves is just that: something we create for ourselves. Real peace comes when we plug in and go with God's flow. His will. Not ours.

Then Peace.

This was my tool for plugging in, circa 1982:

Now it's all I can do to get myself and people around me to UNplug. Still, the thought applies. I like thinking about plugging into God's will. The coolest thing about the Peace tool, however,  is its appearance. Just a coinky-dink? Weird, isn't it?

Plug in. Peace out.

February 28

For Today's Forward Day by Day reading, click here.

Hasn't it been fun checking out the "complete set" we all have at the bottom of our proverbial bags? It's better than Christmas! The hits just keep on spinning! It's like being given a complete set of Star Wars action figures for your birthday.

Wowzers. No shadow box left empty. In addition to Luke Skywalker, you also get Lando...Darth...even Yoda. The total set. One of my best friends growing up had such a collection. And I have to be honest that I've been green about it ever since.

Heck, you could even imagine your complete set looking like a Darth Vader shadow box. With everybody peering out of their little cell, ready for action. But my dorky sci-fi side causes me to digress. Moving on...

Over the past week, we've been picking up and inspecting all the tools God gives us in our complete set. We've looked at Self-Control, the hammer called Faithfulness, the wet blanket of Love, the lei-like qualities of Kindness and the bright shine of Goodness. Today, let's very carefully and very sensitively pick up Gentleness. Gentleness is sometimes difficult to find when you're scrambling for it. It's usually at the bottom of the set, and requires a very conscious act to put it to use. They're gloves. Kid gloves. Ever wonder what kid gloves look like, or what they are? Here's a picture:

Essentially they're fine, white leather gloves that ladies used to wear in decades past. I had to wear some the year I made my debut in San Antonio, and I"ll tell you two things: one, they're hard to find; and two, they are very, very hard to put on. But darn it if they don't look beautiful and give your hand a soft touch.

Gentleness is a wonderful tool. It's soothing, it's quieting, it calms, it allows someone to take it down a notch, even to rest...to breathe. Mothers use Gentleness all the time. And any mother would tell you it comes very natural in some situations, but is often a last resort. The screaming, melting down, red-faced, utterly-at-the-end-of-his-rope child will often have Frustration, Yelling, Spanking or Admonishment hurled at them before Gentleness prevails. I can speak from experience here. A soothing, firm back rub or calm, pacifying words and songs prove Gentleness to be a big gun tool.

Gentleness often comes with a touch, but it can be made manifest in tone or with words. Sometimes it's just a disposition. However Gentleness is used, the outcome is always the same: peace.

Next time you're feeling like this:

Decide if you want to respond like this:

Or squeeze into your kid gloves of Gentleness and be more like this: